Things seem to be really negative and I might sound like an angry person, but it's only because negative stuff ticks me off the most.

Life isn't all that bad, church life isn't all bad. Most of it is good I would like to think and it's probably true.

It's funny how few people or one or two incidents can have so much negative impact. It's a petty. But when you count the blessings, you can't keep track at all because there are simply too much.

Even things that some people intended for bad end up having some positive effect. They sometimes backfire for good.

The past week, I went to practice basketball with other brothers and had a great time with the guys. In the team, we have boys in their 10s, me and Ken in our 20s and others in their 30s and 40s. We have a good bunch. I like how we are of different fellowships and age range.

Saturday service and then church's trip on Sunday. I enjoy being with other brothers and sisters. There were some quiet hostility from some people but those can be ignored. We had fun, had some time to talk and know more about one another. It was time like that that I got to forget about the troubles at church and truly enjoy one another's company like we should. When I can be more of myself, be freer and open myself up more.

There are so much craps we don't need at church.

I heard of news how several senior leaders at churches and seminaries are going through hard time. My hearts go out to them. It's very difficult to stand up for God nowadays. People are different now, more worldly than ever and more self-centered and selfish. People are harder to manage now.

I see the current generation of clergy as sneakier, more worldly, with less struggles and less spiritual maturity. They might be smarter with more advance degrees (actually not really) and better at dealing with people and with ways of the world, but they make compromise with the world to succeed.

The older generations of clergy were more idealistic, pure, simple, spiritually solid, endured (or remembered) more hardship and had a better (purer) heart for God. It can be said that they are also naive, but no, they just knew the truth better.

I look back at the early generation of church leaders in Hong Kong like Dr. Teng and Rev. Bao who were very well educated, been through tough times, had great heart for God and despite their success and their positions, are very humble human beings. They are incredible people. I met them several times and they were very gentle, humble people. Very nice old men. There's no pride or self-glorification in their manners. I thank God that I got to meet them. Just being at their presence taught me a lot.

They have pure hearts for God and with a lot of faith. I hope more pastors nowadays are like them. They are truly servants of God. We need more people like them now.